the absurd observers

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

Old People Vote


The GOP has left quite the metaphoric piece of spinach in their teeth. The strategists behind the swift boat controversy have been kicked into action to delegitimize the AARP over the social security mess. The AARP can't and won't back down from this fight. There's a better chance that Rumsfeld and Rove will be found making out in a West Wing supply closet than there is of the AARP getting scared off.

The AARP is the Tammany Hall of our time. It is the movement of people that can make or break an election. P. Diddy may have convinced some MTV watching 20-somethings to vote, but his clout is miniscule compared to the power of the lobby of the elderly. The AARP is the real world equivalent of the Soggy Bottom Boys from O Brother. If the American political scene was represented by a local news crew, the AARP would be the anchorman to the NRA's food critic and the christian right's traffic reporter. Why? Because the AARP has the best model for growth - everyone gets old. Also, the AARP members and friends vote. They love to vote.

I know the Democrats are always trying to enlist support from the AARP, but why not just swing for the bleachers at this point? Become the party of old people. Old people and liberals. Stop the hohum rebukes of the social security plans, and call the GOP the party of "young wippersnappers" who are against old people. Make it easy for everyone to understand that Democrats are pro old people. Have some party leaders move into retirement homes and assisted living complexes. Maybe introduce legislation for a national Bingo day. Embrace aging. Reject youth. Victory will be inevitable.


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